Dad

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Cracker crust pizza

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Note: Ginger found this pizza crust recipe on line. I usually use a pizza stone and it creates a crust that is truly thin and crispy as a cracker. I made it at Emily's on an airflow pizza pan and it came out like a perfect pizza that I had in Italy. This recipe is for one pizza and can be multiplied by the number you want.

Ingredients:

5 Tbs warm water 1 package yeast 1 Tbs olive oil 3/4 cup all purpose flour 3 Tbs rice flour 2 tsp chopped fresh rosemary 1/2 tsp salt

Directions:

Heat oven to 475 degrees

Dissolve yeast in warm water in a mixing bowl. Add remaining ingredients and sir until the dough forms and pulls away from the edge of the bowl. Place dough on a lightly floured surface and knead slightly.

Allow to rise until double. A tip here: Heat about 1 inch of water in a saucepan until it begins to steam (not boil). Remove from heat. Place a mixing boil on top of the pan, coat the bowl with cooking spray, put dough in the bowl and cover. The dough will rise quickly in about 1/2 hour. Be careful not to make it too hot, as it may dry the crust out.

Punch dough down, then roll out on lightly floured pastry cloth until thin and about 12 inches across. Place on pizza stone, or pizza pan, and cook 3-5 minutes until lightly brown. Be care, it will burn quickly.

Remove the dough from the oven and top. Return the pizza to the oven 5-7 minutes until the cheese is melted and the toppings are cooked.

I do two kinds of pizza, mushroom and Italian meat.

For the mushroom pizza, thinly slice 3-4 types of fresh mushrooms to make about 6-8 cups. Chop 1/2 onion. Saute onion in 2 Tbs olive oil until soft. Add mushrooms and cook until the liquid is evaporated and the mushrooms are browned. You can add a couple of drops of truffle oil and a bit of wine during the cooking, but do not overdue the truffle oil.

Top the cooked crust with pesto sauce, mozzarella cheese, and mushrooms.

For the meat pizza buy whole salami and pepperoni and slice thinly. Top the cooked crust with tomato pizza sauce, mozzarella, & meat.

Curmudgeon complaint department - Really?

Note: I am going to start a series of compaints that will reveal the true nature of my COFdom  (COF = Cranky Old Fart).  Through this forum I will air my rants about rudeness, injustice, and the general unfairness of life.  At 60, I've just had enough.  REALLY(?). 

Mom took her 9/80 day yesterday, while I dutifully came to work.   No grumpiness there.  I got out of the house and generally felt good being busy.  In the afternoon she had a hair appointment and we did the usual thing of me going in for a haircut during the time that the color is setting in her hair.  Once that was done, I had another 45 minutes to wait for the rinse out, cut, & style.  Mom handed me her new iPad and asked me to take it to the kiosk in the mall to have one of those protective covers placed on the screen. 

As I approached the kiosk, the young man (mid 20's something) was slouching  in his chair and messing with a phone in his lap.  I stepped up, obviously there for a reason, and there was that subtle berat of a pause of indifference before he put his phone down and acknowledged my presence -REALLY(?).  When he did acknowledge me he didn't look at me and didn't engage in any back and forth.  No, how are you today.  No, this is what it costs.  No, this is what you get for the service.  Nothing.   I told him what I wanted, he took the iPad, and without further interaction went about putting the film on it -REALLY(?).  

Now  I recognize that I didn't come here for, nor really expect, witty reparte, but some human to human interaction and nicety would have been pleasant.  Just a bit of, 'this is what I am doing, this is what to do with this, etc.,' would have been better than being ignored.  Still we had not crossed into curmudgeonland at this point. 

I noticed that part of the failure to look at me was dure to the fact that his attention was on his phone.  I also noticed that every few seconds he stopped what he was doing on the iPad to do a couple of pokes on the phone.  I could see the screen and realized that it was a pool table game and he was lining up shots and knocking the balls around the table  -REALLY(?).  You are blatantly going to make me stand here while you take time to continue playing a game - REALLY(?)? 

I struggled not to say something.  I told myself the following:  a) the whole process takes maybe 3 minutes, b) if you add the time he takes to play his game, it may have added 15-20 seconds, c) I really have nowhere else to go that should make me impatient,  and d) if you say something, he will simply think you're a D and be even more deliberately casual toward the work he is doing. 

Still, I was the customer, I might have been in a hurry, I was paying $45 for a piece of plastic to be put on the iPad screen. Some civility and attention is not too much to expect.  The fact that he was now taking away MY/my time (the time that I have to spend doing other things that I want to do) and My/his time (the time that I am paying him for his service) felt like pretty much of a yuck fou statement in my face.    

We have come to be a society of open disrespect and disinterest.  We sit in meetings where people expect our full attention and run both business and personal email.  I will admit that I have even followed the ESPN feed for football games, while in a meeting.  We get on airplanes and ignore one another, while texting, talking, and playing on our electronic umbilicals.  Granted, there is a bit of a social contract that, if you are going to take my time, you need to make it worth my time, or I will check out.  Our electronics give us the opportunity to do something useful with that lost time. 

Despite my own admitted sins, this irritated me.  I wanted to say, 'I get it. You are are working a lame job, sitting in a lame mall box, and dealing with a lame COF who thinks you owe him a degree of servitude.  But maybe your attitude is why all of the above apply."  I wanted to say, "Do you think you could put that game aside while you work for me."

But, I didn't say anything.  I smiled amiably attempting to win his good will. I took the iPad back, attempted to hear his mumbled instructions about giving it time to fully seal, etc., and gave him my debit card.  It only took him two more pool shots to run the card.  I turned away, pointedly ignoring the jar with the hand printed label - TIPS.  - REALLY(?). 

May you have a wonderful sucky life.

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Fried Green Tomatoes with Memphis Sauce

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Nanni made these as an appetizer for the traditional New Year's dinner of ham, black-eyed peas, turnip greens, and corn bread.  Oh man!  It is best to heat them while they are hot, so doing them as an appetizer is a great idea.  This is true southern cuisine at its finest.  The cornmeal gives the outside a crispy crunch.  The sauce is a cross between remoulade and 1000 island dressing.  Memphis dressing

1/2 teaspoon lemon juice

1 cup mayonaise

2 tablespoons chili sauce (found in the ketchup section)

2 pepperoncini (greek) pepers seeded and diced

1/2 teaspoon of the pepper juice from the jar

pinch of pepper

1 tablespoon of capers chopped

Mix these ingredients together and let stand prior to preparing the tomatoes.  Sever the tomatoes with sauce by the side for dipping, or drizzled over the top. 

Tomatoes

Egg wash

2 egss

1/2 cup buttermilk

Whisk together in a pie pan or shallow bowl

Breading

1 cup cornmeal

1/2 cup all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon pepper

1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper

Mix these ingredients together in a pie pan or shallow bowl

Tomatoes

2-3 green tomatoes sliced 1/4 inch thick

Dip each slice in the egg wash then

Dredge the dampened slices in the breading until covered

Fry each slice in a fry pan with about 1/4 inch of oil, or deep fry in a sauce pan with 1 1/2 inch of oil heated to 370 degrees (a bit of batter dropped in will bubble and stay together at this temperature).

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Nanni's Biscuits Recipe

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Note:  After several years of making these, I just discovered that Nanni had been holding out on me.  She had never told be about the sugar.   Every southern cook mus master biscuit making as an essential skill.  Nanni swears that the secret is White Lily flour.   Living is Alaska, I don't have access to White Lily.  I have managed to get close, but not the nice light crispiness that Carolyn achieves.  I think the oven has something to do with it as well.  Ingredients

1/3 cup shortening

2 cups self-rising flour

1 cup buttermilk

1 teaspoon sugar

Preheat oven to 400

Cut flour and sugar into the shortening.  Start with a fork, then use your hand rubbing the mixture between thumb and fingers until it has the consistency of cornmeal. Stir in the buttermilk just until the dough is moistened throughout. 

Turn onto a floured pastry cloth and knead lightly just until the dough is no longer sticky.  Using a rolling pin, roll the dough out to about 1 inch thickness.  Place on a lightly greased pan and bake until golden brown.

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Deviled eggs

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Ingredients 6 eggs hard boiled (see procedure below)

1/4 cup mayonaise

1 teaspoon yellow mustard

1 tablespoon sweet pickle relish (I actually use about 2)

1/8 teaspoon salt

dash of pepper

paprika

Directions

Place the eggs in a pan with about 1/2 inch of water over the top of the eggs.  Turn heat to medium-high.  Bring the water to a boil (with the eggs in it).  Remove the pan from the heat, cover with a lid, and let sit for 15 minutes.  Pour off the hot water and run under cold water until the pan and eggs are cool.  Peel the shell off the eggs.

With a sharp knife cut each egg in half lengthwise.  Remove the yolk halves to a bowl and place the white halves on a platter.  Using a fork, mash the yolks until they are a uniform mixture.  Stir in the remaining ingredients, except the paprika.  Stir until the mixture is smooth.  Taste the mixture and adjust salt, pepper, and relish to taste.  Using a spatula, place the yolk mixture into a ziplock sandwich bag.  Snip one corner.  Pipe the mixture through the open corner filling each egg white half on the platter.

Sprinkle paprika on the top.  Chill for about an hour.  Serve.

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Scallops and fettucine with lemon caper sauce

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Note: We made this while we were in Baton Rouge with Todd and Nick for Christmas.  We were able to get some very nice bay scallops about the size of the end of my thumb at the high end market close to their apartment.  I think we had a bottle of Nora.  I have done versions of this over the years, slowly perfecting the techniques and working within the variability of trial and error and approximate measures.  Maybe it was more about the company and season, but we got it JUST RIGHT this evening.  I will make this recipe for two. It can be adjusted up or down. I would not increase the flour mixture proportionately but, maybe, by half with each doubling of the number of servings.

Be sure to prepare the sauce before you start the scallops. Be warming the pasta water while you are preparing the sauce. It will take about 10 minutes to come to a boil and that is about the right amount of time to get the sauce ready. Get the oil and butter ready for the scallops, then start to cook them at about the same time you put the pasta in the water.

Scallops

1/2 pound bay scallops 1/2 cup flour 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon pepper 1/4 teaspoon cayenne or ground chipotle powder 2 tablespoons olive oil 1/4 cup butter

Combine flour, salt, peper, and cayenne in a 1 gallon zip lock bag. Heat olive oil and butter to medium high heat in a 12 inch skillet. Be careful not to burn the butter. If it starts to turn brown, reduce the heat. It will likely brown as the scallops cook, but you don't want to burn it early. Time the cooking of the scallops to be right after you put the pasta in the boiling water.

Just before cooking, toss the scallops in the sealed zip lock bag with the flour until they are lightly coated. Transfer the scallops to the heated oil/butter, scattering them evenly across the pan. Allow to cook 3-4 minutes. Toss or gently stir the scallops such that most are turned. Cook another 2 minutes. Stir again and cook 2 more minutes until the scallops are uniformly browned. Transfer to a paper towel and keep warm until serving. Retain the mixture of browned butter and flour in the frying pan.

Fettucine sauce

1/4 cup olive oil 2 tablespoons butter 1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper 1 tablespoon capers juice of one lemon (2 tablespoons) 1/4-1/2 cup chopped fresh parsley 1 hand full fettucine 1 tablespoon salt

Heat oil and red and black pepper over a medium heat 3-5 minutes. Remove from heat and add lemon juice stirring quickly to cool the oil and avoid splattering. Return the mixture to heat and reduce to low-medium heat. Juice should begin to bubble slightly but not spatter. (If you want and have it, you can add a couple of tablespoons of white wine here two.  I keep some of those small bottles of mediocre wine around for this purpose.)  Add capers and stir. Add butter and stir when it is melted. The goal is to blend the liquid and oil such that they are not separated. Reduce the heat to low and add 1/2 of the parsley. Keep warm.

Final preparation

When the pasta is cooked remove 1/2 cup of the water and set aside. Drain the pasta then add it to the reserved butter/flour mixture with the pasta water in the fry pan. Stir until the pasta is coated. Give the sauce a quick stir, then drizzle over the pasta mixture. You may not need all of the sauce. The pasta should be lightly coated. Add the remaining parsley and toss all one last time.

Serving

Place pasta on plate and top with a portion of the scallops.

Enjoy

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Best part of a hairdresser brother? Free haircuts.

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We're right in the middle of the Christmas season, so I figured it was time for a family update. After leaving San Antonio on Friday, Mom and Dad traveled to Baton Rouge to see Todd and Nick. On Christmas eve they went to a posh wine bar called WINO (Wine Institute of New Orleans).

I'm just going to say that Todd looks like he's not so happy in this picture.

Christmas morning dad got up early and made his famous cinnamon rolls. Nick's mom came over and enjoyed Christmas morning with the family.

For Christmas, Dad surprised Mom with a new iPad. We're not sure what we'll call this new addition to the family yet. iPad3? iPad junior? No worries. Mom's old iPad is going to Dad. Hopefully he won't break this one. Beware elder iPad.

Some day later, Mom and Dad went to Regis where Todd cut their hair. True Macrander fact. Todd cuts all of our hair. Every single one of us. I can't remember the last time I paid to get my hair cut or highlighted. That is wonderful. It also helps that Todd is giving of his time and very good at what he does.

Here's a picture of Alaska Mom getting her "Northern Lights" touched up.

Anyway, this evening, Mom and Dad are headed to Birmingham to see Mom's parents. I'm (Emily) already here. I got here last night and had the grandparents to myself for a whole evening.

Before coming to Alabama, I spent the holiday with Underwood clan. Let's see. Christmas eve for me was spent in the afternoon with Jarrod's dad's parents, Mr. and Mrs. Tappmeyer. Then we went to church. Then we chilled and napped. Then church again for the midnight service at Jarrod and I's church Canvas in Montrose. That was special because we usually meet in an elementary school and for this occasion we were in First Christian. I love celebrating the birth of Jesus with my wonderful church family.

Christmas morning we headed over to the Jarrod's mother's parents home for a brunch and then it was back to the Underwood home. I was surprised with a beautiful red KitchenAid mixer from mother and father Underwood and an ice cream maker from Dylan and Kaitlyn. I guess they know I like to cook, right?

The night came to an end with a visit from the Wiesendangers, Mollie and Layne.

Okay, I'm a person that stresses to the max over Christmas. I'm still waiting for the holy grail no-cry Christmas (maybe Christmas 2014??). But all said and done, I am blessed. I have wonderful family spread all over the country and my brother has a loving partner. I have Jarrod and his family is very gracious to me. And I have a little dog.

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Christmas with Nick & Todd

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We just spent 3+ great days here in Baton Rouge with Todd & Nick. It was a really special Christmas. We had great food, lots of good wine, did some shopping and sight seeing, farkled (Thanks to Sarah for introducing our family to farling) and, generally relaxed.

There are many special times for a parent. The birth (of course), first step, first goal, off to school, becoming an adult and accomplishments and honors along the way. What must rank right up there is being with your child as they cross into that special relationship that makes them whole, happy, and secure. Being with Todd & Nick feels that way. Our family is bigger and stronger.

May you always continue to grow in love and support one another as you mature as people and expand their horizons individually and together.

Thanks for a wonderful three days.

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Nanni's / Michael's rolls

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One of those recipes that should not get lost is this great family standard.  Just remember, in Alabama these are officially Nanni's rolls.  In TX, AK, etc. they are Michael's rolls.  I will give the real recipe.  For most family occasions, I usually do a double recipe. This is easiest done with a stand mixer, but many rolls have been made with a bowl, a spoon, and elbow grease

Ingredients

1 package yeast

1/4 cup warm water

1/4 cup sugar

1/4 cup oil

1 cup buttermilk

3 1/2 cups self-rising flour  (this is approximate.  use enough flour to bring the dough together)

Butter or margarine

Directions

Dissolve the yeast in the warm water and let stand for a couple of minutes.   Add sugar and oil.  Let stand another couple of minutes, so that the yeast can start working on the sugar.  Add the buttermilk and sitr until well blended.  Add flour 1/2 cup at a time until the dough comes together and forms a ball away from the bowl.  Turn the dough onto a floured pastry cloth and knead until it is not sticky.

Roll out to a thickness of 3/4 - 1 inch.  Cut into rolls about 2 inches across.   Using a knife, cut each roll through partially, place a small pat of butter in the middle and fold over.  Place each roll on a greased baking sheet.  Cover and allow to rise in a warm place for approximately 1 hour.

Bake at 400 until browned on the top.

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Twas a Macrander eve before Christmas eve

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On the eve before Christmas eve and all through the nation, Mom and Dad were driving to Baton Rouge and trying to agree on a radio station.

Excited to visit Todd and Nick, and wave goodbye to their daughter,

Mom exclaimed, ‘Oh my! Texas couldn’t be hotter.’

So far in the trip Dad had visited his sister,

And Mom had bought some cheap shoes that dad swore would cause a blister,

Shout out to Kayla, the newest addition to us all,

Who was born at just over six pounds on Friday and oh so small.

Todd was busy cleaning, while Nick busy mixing,

Lots of treats to fill their home, Mom and Dad would surely find transfixing,

Sarah was still in Denver, though lonely was not she,

For the beauty of friends and mountains, how much better could life be?

So this morning, Emily sits at her computer not working, oh no, no,

Excited to see Jarrod and family, but more to the point Santa, ho ho ho.

God is great, Jesus is born, this is the reason for the season,

But getting to see the ones we love sure is extra pleasin’

So as we close this year before,

Let’s enjoy our moments together and plan for many more.

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Christmas in New Zealand

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Image and video hosting by TinyPicI will report out on my trip to New Zealand in another entry in the blog, but I thought this was perfect for a funny happenings entry.

The New Zealand that I saw from the air and in the brief taxi ride from the airport into town was a phenomenal landscape of mountains, coastline, and agrarian fields that were reminiscent of Hawaii and the Lord of the Rings movies. The town of Dunedin (pronounce doon-ee-dn), though, was nothing spectacular. Actually, it very much had the look and feel of a mid-sized Midwestern city, buildings 2-3 stories high sidewalks overhung by awnings on storefronts, small businesses, etc. There was kind of a barely prosperous look to the whole thing. My hotel was about a mile from the meeting sight, so I got in nice walks each day going to and from.

Similar to the city, the people were very English, not the most attractive people in the world. It was a combination of rosy-cheeked flat- faced young boys growing into stolid George Smiley (literary reference here) older men. And, there were pinch-faced girls trending toward stout Mrs. Doubtfire matrons.

The first two days were cool, overcast, and drizzly. The weather made me glad I had taken my gortex, and, leant an even greater sense of a community in doldrums. On the third day I hung in my room catching up on email and work until about 11, then, headed out under clearing skies and warming temperatures for the walk to the conference. With the great weather, the sidewalks were packed with shoppers that I realized were beginning to get serious about the Christmas holidays. I caught the festive feel and there was a spring in my step and a smile on my face.

Walking along, I became aware of a car driving down the street with the windows rolled down and a Christmas song blasting from the radio. The jingling bells and piano of the instrumental break were from jingle-bell rock. Looking at the car I saw a grundgy boy behind the wheel and a tattooed and pierced tough looking girl hanging a cigarette out the window with a smirk on her face. Ah, the wonders of Christmas. Even the young toughs have the spirit. How nice.

As the car passed me and the music began to fade, the next verse started up. “You make my d--- swell, as I moan and yell….” OMG! Did I really hear that? As the sound of the song faded into the traffic and street noise, I wanted to turn and chase the car to see if it was real or just my dirty mind playing tricks on me. But, the rest of the day, as I tried to listen to complex talks on whale genomics and sound propagation and exposure, those two lines continued to bounce around my head.

I did a search on Jingle Bell Rock spoofs and, indeed, the song is real and I heard correctly. It is so bad that I will not post the link here. WARNING. This is pretty graphic stuff and you may not want to forever have these lyrics in your head. DO NOT listen to this at work, unless you have earphones in. Having given these warnings, I know everyone will listen. Happy Holidays.